Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Uncertainty

We never really know what we're doing. Okay, maybe you do, but you are an exception. We're just running around, trying to do everything when we can't even hold onto one thing. It's high school. High school in my area, at least. Grades are our lives. Do you remember in Harry Potter when Hermione thought getting expelled would be worse than death? Well for us, that's true. We all try so hard and what for? To get into college. To get a better education. And then what? Most of us don't know. So what are we doing now? Everything we can. And will we get into the school of our dreams, if we even know what that is? We can't say for sure, not with how competitive it is now. We don't know what's going to happen in our lives, and no one ever has, but we're working so hard for a future we can't guarantee. And honestly, that scares me.
Our whole lives are uncertain, and that makes us uncertain. We aren't sure if there's a meaning to it all, and if there is what that meaning is, and if we should be doing what we're doing. During high school, we have to deal with all that, while our brains are still developing. And on top of that, our feelings are uncertain. Very few teenagers actually are completely sure of how they feel. This can be related to political and religious beliefs, and some people will continue with that uncertainty for the rest of their lives. It can also be related to emotions. We don't know how we feel about ourselves, our friends, our peers. We may think we do, but it's always fleeting, always changing. Try asking yourself how you feel. You might have an answer, but you might struggle with it. Sometimes I'm completely sure I'm happy, and other times I have no idea. Sometimes I think I'm something at first, but when I think about it I'm completely confused. Disappointed. Scared. Happy. Sad. Angry. Sometimes I just don't know.
But that's normal. I used to hate hearing that other people had the same problem as me. I was thinking oh great, don't worry about it, it's nothing, this happens to everyone? And I got mad about that. But now I see that it really just helps me. I'm uncertain about things. I'm a teenage girl. If I knew exactly how I felt all the time or whether or not I'm actually agnostic, then that would be amazing. But I don't, and eventually I will.
Teenagers need to enjoy high school. We need to stop stressing about all these uncertainties. No, don't stop working toward your future, but don't stretch yourself thin. Make sure to do things that you like, and be certain about as much as you can, for your own sanity. Let go of the things that stress you out. Be who you want to be, and if that changes, you can too.

"There was no direction."-Gone by Michael Grant

Sunday, April 28, 2013

Ignorance Is Bliss

They say that ignorance is bliss. Maybe it is. What would ignorance mean? Would it mean not knowing about horrible things? Not realizing what human beings are capable of? I don’t know if that would be such a good thing. I think that all that would do is give more power to those that weren't ignorant. Sure, maybe the ignorant people would think they were happy, but would they be? Or would they just be living in this false pretense of happiness? What even constitutes as happiness? Is it when we forget who we are and everything else because right in that moment we’re happy? Or is it when we realize how wonderful things are and we don’t want anything to change? They’re kind of opposites, but they’re both ways that happiness is described. There’s also this connotation with happy moments that we don’t want real life to settle in. I feel like this is stated in books a lot. The two characters will be kissing, and it’s ‘all she’s ever wanted’ or whatever, but then real life sets in. They get an adrenaline rush on the mission, but then they have to get back to real life. Is this insinuating that happiness isn't real life? Can we not be happy with the lives that we have?
So, ignorance is not bliss. It can make us forget for a while, and we may think we’re happy, but eventually we’ll find real life. Real life will settle in, and then what? So that bliss can’t last. Real happiness can. We just have to accept the lives that we live and be happy with them. If we can’t do that, we should change the way we live. I’m happy right now. Sometimes I melt down or freak out, but we all do that. Those are a few things in my life that I’m not happy with, and I’m changing them. I’m not fixing them, I’m changing them. It’s my belief that when you feel like you’re broken, you’re not. You just aren’t finished yet. While you’re still going, you can mold who you want to be. And the things that you’re happy with can just be. You don’t have to hold onto them for your life, just be happy that they’re there. A lot of things in my life are like that right now. I’m not doing anything about it except enjoying it, and it seems to be working out for me. Of course, if it’s a person, there’s generally no harm in telling them you care about them, you appreciate them, you love them, whatever it is. You can just tell them that they make you happy, It is important to recognize those responsible for happy parts of your life, just as long as your happiness isn’t completely reliant on one person. If it is, that person should be you. I want to say that they’ll be there, but we established that ignorance is not bliss. They may not always be there for you, so you have to be there for you.

My life is just about perfect.”-Renegade by J. A. Souders

Saturday, April 27, 2013

Strength

Today I've been thinking a lot about strength. Not physical strength, but mental strength. The ability to stay strong through a tough situation, to smile despite the tears and laugh despite the pain. I've witnessed a lot of strength in my friends that I don't think even they see. Life happens, and we can't predict the emotional roller coaster it's going to take us on. So we don't know if we're going to be really happy when we happen to have a sad event to go to, or be really sad when we have a big party that night. Some people would not go, or allow their feelings to take over the event. Those people are the weak people. When they're sad, it's all about them. Now every once and a while that's okay, but this post is for the strong people. The ones who hide what they're feeling so that everyone else can enjoy that party and everyone else can live their lives. Those people are strong. They know that it's not all about them, and they can wait for their turn. It comes, but not right away. Maybe it's a day or two after their pet died that their friends can all give them a hug and talk about how much they all loved that pet. Those people can handle things, they can go through the worst things and it might be a while before anyone notices.
To those strong people: it's okay. You can let go. It's hard to be strong. To hold your own feelings inside because you don't feel like your feelings are important enough, or maybe you just don't like sharing, but you need to. I applaud you for being strong, but you need to talk. To vent. To scream. To cry. To laugh. To hug and be hugged. Now is your time. The more you hold it in, the worse it's going to get. You've waited through all your friends problems, through all the fun nights you didn't want to spoil, through all that other stuff that you told yourself was more important. It's not. The strong people are the ones that get left out, because they're busy helping out the others. They're looking after everyone else so much that no one thinks to look after them.
I was really thinking of one friend I have. At first, I was the strong one, and I broke down to her Thursday night about something that had happened that made me sad. She helped me tell our other friends the next day, and I was much calmer than when I had told her the first time. She held me up when I wasn't strong anymore. I finally had accepted that it was my time. If I was allowed a time to be sad, it was then. But then I thought about her. About how she was always holding me up and helping me. She makes these comments sometimes, and sometimes they're more than comments, and so far I've done nothing. I've been like every other person out there, thinking of my own problems and letting her be strong. But she deserves to let down her guard. To not always be the strong one, and I hope that I can give that to her. Maybe she talks to someone else, but part of me has this feeling she's like me, I just cracked first. But it's not a competition. Being strong isn't always a good thing. It gets tiring, frustrating, and sometimes sad. There are things that shouldn't be ignored.
If you have a friend that this made you think of, someone that you think might be the strong one, talk to them. Even if they don't think they do, they need to talk to someone. No one can be strong all the time. Well, maybe they can, but no one should have to be.

"'I can't do it by myself,' I whispered.
'You can,' he said. There was a tremulous note in his voice. 'You're strong—you're so, so strong. It's why I love you.' " -Shadow Kiss by Richelle Mead

Friday, April 26, 2013

How Are You?

This is something we ask and get asked a hundred times a day. Not exactly that many, but you get the point. Anyway, no one actually wants to know how anyone is. It's just something that we say, it's part of our socially accepted greeting. Then we always answer that we're good, or fine, or whatever, and both parties move on. Sometimes we don't even think about what we're saying, and we find ourselves telling people we're doing great when really we're not at all. It's a natural reaction when people ask how we are to lie to them. It doesn't seem like a lie, because they don't want to know the truth. They don't want to hear that you aren't alright, that you are not okay, that you're about to cry. That might be a but extreme, but maybe you're having a bad day. The sad truth is that most people don't care. They don't know what to do if you don't respond with one of those predetermined answers. So with most people, saying you're good is probably the right answer. But some people do care. There are people in your life, friends or family or teachers or even me, that care how you're doing, so in that case tell them. Because that I'm not fine is going to eat up at you inside if you don't tell someone. Make sure it's the right person to tell, because the right person will help you out, and the wrong person, well, they're the wrong person. Don't let your feelings get so much that you have to tell them to someone, because then they'll all spill out to someone you don't want them to, and you'll regret it.

"'Okay?' 'Okay'."- The Fault In Our Stars by John Green

Thursday, April 25, 2013

Instinct

Instincts. We all have them, and they're there for lots of different things. We all get the instinct not to go down that dark alley by ourselves, not to call out to see if the killer's in the house, and to fight/flight(whichever you prefer) if someone attacks us. But that's not what I want to talk about. I'm talking about the instinct we have to become someone's friend, to stay away from someone, to do our homework or not, or to say that comment we're considering saying. Those things that you could't possibly know but somehow you just have a feeling. I learned today that I should listen to those instincts. I had a feeling that I should push forward to start a comedysportz team at my school even though odds are against it, and we just got permission for it, it's going to happen. I had a feeling I should go see the school play last night and now here I am, running the light board because their usual guy couldn't make it. Those things worked out well for me because I went with my instincts, and not with what other people told me or expected. They may seem like small things, but these are just recent examples. It's almost just making the right decision, some people will say it's just chance. But I believe in that feeling you get. It happens when you shouldn't do something, too. Like when everyone tells you to go for that guy, but some little voice is telling you not to, and you go for him. Then you end up getting hurt, either with immediate rejection or break up, and if you ask me, that's generally worse. But if you listened to that little voice, it could have been avoided. All sorts of things can come from your instincts, and it's worth listening to them. Go against the odds, do what feels right to you. You'll have more fun than if you just follow all the rules and do what you're told.

No quote because I couldn't find one. It's harder than it looks.

Monday, April 22, 2013

Everyone's a Winner

In this day and age, the phrase "everyone's a winner" is one that is persistently ruining the concept of competition.
In almost every competition today, they don't actually compete. Everyone just does whatever it is they're doing and then they get an award. Everyone wins, they all get a medal, regardless of talent. This makes it so no one learns anything. They all believe they're the best, and it's not going to end well for them. Sure, confidence is great, but people need to be realistic. Competitions help people learn what they're good at and what they need to work on. It's a learning experience, and this whole "everyone wins" thing robs people of that opportunity.
It also makes people expect to win, and they value the prize more than the actual work they're doing. No matter what their score, they expect a prize. They expect to get something even if they're horrible, and that's not right. If you don't do something well, you're not going to get rewarded. In the real world, you're going to get fired, or at least reprimanded, and the idea that you should always be rewarded is ridiculous.
Be careful about your expectations. Not your expectations for life or whatever, but what you expect to get when you do things. Because if you are one of these people, most of the time people are just going to see you as an obnoxious person who doesn't know how to lose. Knowing how to accept a loss is important. If you don't know how to lose, you can't grow from it, you can't learn, and you can't move on. No one wins all the time, and the concept of "everyone's a winner" is making it so people don't realize that.

"If more of us valued food and cheer above hoarded gold, it would be a much merrier world." -The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien

Sunday, April 21, 2013

Being Nice

It's a lot of pressure to be nice all the time. Maybe it's just me, but I feel like I always have to be nice and kind and caring. Most of the time it's natural, and I'm actually just being nice, being me. But the small fraction of time when I'm just done, I feel like I have to be just as nice as I usually am. It's stressful. I feel like I'm not allowed to say a mean word, ever. When I do, people either laugh because I'm joking or they look at me with these hurt eyes and then I have to apologize. Sometimes it isn't my fault. See, when you're nice all the time, you say yes to things, which leaves your to do list longer than most. And when you have that much to do, sometimes you just want help. And when no one is helping me, I get frustrated, and then I either yell at a friend who then looks hurt, or I yell at my family, who totally doesn't deserve it because they do help me. I just need to learn to say no. I'm spreading myself too thin, always doing something, always choosing the nice option. Well, I don't want to. I don't want to be really nice.
Another thing about being nice it that you can be too nice. You all know that person that's really annoying and people don't like simply because they're too nice? I'm scared all the time that that's me. Sometimes I truly think I'll become that. Now I know this seems weird, complaining about being nice, and maybe some of you are thinking "what is she going on about, she isn't nice", but it's not really about that. It's about the pressure. The feeling that other people expect me to be a certain way. When people ask me to do something, they expect it to get done and get done well, because that's how I do things. I'm capable and I like to help people out. And usually, I don't like to ask for help.
People like me are too proud. We know that we can do something, or at least we want to be able to, and we won't ask someone to help us. We'd rather do it or attempt to do it than admit that we want to be helped. Truthfully, I wish someone would come along and help with something. Anything. It'd just be nice if they could scratch one thing off the list so that I could breathe a little easier.
In this day and age, we're expected to do a lot of different things, mostly to boost our resumes so we can get into a good school. It's ridiculous. And it makes me feel like I have to do all of those things perfectly, including grades.
Everyone has these pressures, I know. I just feel like people act like it's super easy for me. The phrase "of course you are, Mackenzie," pertaining to just about anything, pisses me off. There's no "of course". I do a lot of work in everything that I do, and it exhausts me just as much as it does everyone else. Then you could argue that if I have time to write a blog, then I have too much time. This takes me about ten minutes to write, at most. And it's not really about the time. It's about the work, and the expectations. And the feeling that no matter how much I do I'm never going to be done.
This is all about being nice because through all this, I'm expected to be happy all the time? To never get mad at anyone? To be nice? I can't tell you how many times the first adjective used to describe me has been nice. Not smart, funny, pretty, or anything else. It's almost always nice.
It's not that people aren't nice to me. People are generally nice to me, so it's not one of those issues. It's just that I can picture most of my friends yelling at us for no reason and we'd shrug it off, but if I did that? I feel like I'd get strange stares. I try. I really do try to keep it together sometimes...but no one really seems to get it. This whole post is probably going to make no sense to anyone who reads it. Sometimes the things that go on inside my head don't want to stay there, and I want to scream at people for assuming that I'm fine, that I'm always nice, and that I don't do things wrong. Then again, this is called Inside My Mind A Moment, and the world is selfish, so what can I do?

"which is impossible, but what can you do?"-Company by Stephen Sondheim (book by George Furth)

Saturday, April 20, 2013

Girl Pressure-Being Pretty

First of all, I didn't post yesterday. I don't know if that actually matters to any of you, but still, sorry.
Being a girl. It's an age old topic, because half the population can never know what it's like. In our society, being a girl oftentimes includes a pressure to look good. We have unrealistic standards of how we should look, and we know that, yet we still strive to be that way. Sometimes I don't care and throw on a sweatshirt and jeans, but the truth is, I want to be someone that people consider pretty. I think that deep down, most girls do. Some not so deep down. And it's sad, because everyone is pretty in different ways. It's completely stupid of us to expect everyone to be exactly the same. If you didn't inherit certain genes then you're somehow not as good as someone else? "It's not who we are inside, but what we do that defines us." That's from Batman. I'm going to take this literally for the sake of example, and say that it's not our DNA that defines who we are, but the things that we do. So we shouldn't rely on being pretty. Truthfully, being pretty is going to help you in life. Really pretty girls get more, it's just a fact. But by not relying on that, you can get more. Pretty or 'not', you can do well in life by owning the other parts of who you are. Relying on looks is the easy way out. But you know, sometimes you just can't help it. You don't know you're using your looks to get something. That's okay. I don't really know, I've never done it, but don't let your looks consume you.
I guess this could apply to guys, but girls have to deal with trying to look good every day. I realize I talked about being pretty and not being a girl, but they go hand in hand. That's the most stressful part about being a girl, if you ask me. Yeah, yeah, childbirth and periods and all that, but don't you think we've complained about that enough?

"It's not who we are inside, but what we do that defines us."-Batman Begins

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Social Awkwardness

So today I'm going to talk about social awkwardness. At first I was going to talk about boredom, but I realized it would end up being about awkwardness anyway(as that is what comes of boredom in public), so here it is.
Being "awkward" has become something cute and admirable in today's society, as a product of the adorably awkward stars like Zooey D-something on New Girl. Of course, awkward can be adorable, but most of the time, true awkwardness is just a hinderance. To the awkward person, not anyone else.
To be socially awkward is to not know what to do in a social situation. Many people have become this because of smartphones and other mobile devices that monopolizes our attention while in public. I'd like to say I'm exempt from this, but I'm sitting at a track meet, writing this on my phone. We've created a generation of people that, in most situations, will turn to their phone instead of another person. Now, our phones have a lot of great uses, I just think that it's gone a bit overboard. In a way, we're rendering real social interactions unnecessary, and that scares me. That creates all these people who don't know how to act around other people.
Social awkwardness is not confined by just that. It includes those kids that are anti-social, and the one time they go to a party, they immediately leave or they don't have much fun. It also includes that kid that hangs on the outside of groups. There's also that kid that at first seems really fun but just has not had enough friends to really realize what is and is not socially acceptable.
Of course, all this leads back to the fact that social awkwardness is defined by social standards that seem arbitrary. Who came up with those rules that just seem to be there? They aren't written down, they're barely spoken, yet they're there. Everyone has to follow social rules. Well, technically you don't, but let's face it, you have to have so much courage to step outside of them. I'm not saying conform, I'm talking about not making animal noises in public. Go ahead, but people are going to judge, and you're probably just doing it for attention. I don't know though, maybe you enjoy it. Whatever you want. Anyway, we've come up with these rules, and we, as a society, will enforce them. We've decided this group of people we deem "socially awkward", so it's our choice on how we deal with it. To be honest, I'm not quite sure where I'm going with this. I guess I'm just trying to say that we are society, so don't feel confined by what society says. The connotation of "awkward" has changed before, many things have. We have the the power to change it, maybe not individually but as a whole, and that takes the individuals doing it on their own, there isn't going to be an announcement. It's just going to happen.

"It would be so nice if something made sense for a change."- Alice in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Who We Are

I feel like people spend a lot of time trying to figure out "who they are". It's almost an obsession with today's society. There are camps and self-realization clinics and a whole bunch of other things that help people to better understand themselves. Doesn't life do that for you? There's an existentialist belief that what you do and how you react to things makes up who you are, it's not something that has always been there for you to 'find'. I'm not quite sure if I'm that extreme, but I do think that the person you are isn't waiting to be found. It's there all along, you just might be a little confused at first, that's all. Especially in high school, and I don't know how long this lasts, but we have different sides. Everyone acts different ways around different people, and sometimes they're so separated that we feel as if only one of them must be our true self, especially since we feel all this pressure to know who we are or what we want or whatever. We feel the need to deem one of them real and the rest made up, but the truth is we're all of them, we just need to find a balance. See, sometimes I have this 'dark' side, if you will, and it can be quite...well, I'm not even sure how to describe it. But it's nothing like the happy, nice side I show to my group of girls. Whenever I'm acting each way, I'd like to believe that that's who I am, but it's not. Either way, I'm lying about a little of it. We also do that. Lie. A lot, actually. Just little lies all the time and sometimes we don't even know why we say them. Usually it's to impress someone that we don't consciously want to impress, or to fit in, or for any other reason that most of the time we're not even aware of unless we're being brutally honest about it. And when was the last time a teenager was really honest with themselves? You may be thinking right now that you're honest with yourself, but we all have a sense of being lost or insecure sometimes, and we can't show it all the time. Every time you bury a feeling, you're not being honest with yourself. And that's okay, I'm not saying it's bad. It's a part of life. Anyway, I'm a bit of both of those things, but most of the time I feel I can't show both sides without being judged for one of them. I know I shouldn't care, but again with the honesty, I do. I don't want to be judged for who I am. I am who I am, and I can't be anyone else, so it'd be really great if people didn't judge me for that. So I usually pick one of my sides to be (there are more than two), and it leaves me wondering who I am. Who am I, really? Honestly, I'm not sure. I'm a mix of all the different "me"s that I present to the world, but I don't know how much of each one is put into the mix. It's not something I have to find on a mission or some other spiritual journey or whatever. It's something that I'm going to grow into as I grow up. I'm going to find out who I am as I live, and it's going to always change. I guess it almost doesn't matter who I am, but who I'm aiming to be. I'll accept the parts of me that have to stay the same, but the things that I can change, I'll focus on how I want them to be. A cake doesn't get baked by staring at the batter. You have to turn the oven on.

"He looks like nobody but himself."-The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Music

This post is inspired by my boyfriend, who really likes music, and he gave me a mixtape today, so it got me thinking about music. Music means more than most things to a lot of people. It's inspiration, motivation, creativity, emotion, and brilliance. At the same time, it's noise. It's just a random grouping of noises that we have deemed as sounding good. Take dupstep for instance. It's a kind of music that I happen to enjoy, but many people don't understand how it can even be counted as music. A lot of modern music is seen as "not real music" simply because people still have an "old" frame of mind when it comes to music. Don't get me wrong, I love older music, and I really don't like a lot of the music that's being produced right now, but it is still music. People are entitled to like it. What I do't like is that music can make a difference in the world. It's a way to send a message that is nonviolent, efficient, and really smart. I wish more people took advantage of that in a positive way, instead of sending messages that are going to nurture the human stupidity. This does not mean all music is stupid, it means that it's not making people think about what we're doing to the world, how people are getting treated, and what is really happening. It's talking about who you should be doing it with and what drinks or drugs you should be doing. Not to sound like a parent or anything, but I really don't think those are necessary in songs. Words are a powerful thing, and they can be a weapon or a tool. This goes for all social media outlets. I think that when we have the ability to send profitable messages, we should. Simple as that.
Anyway, music. Most people have music tastes. They have certain things that they like or don't like, and I totally get that. But I like pretty much all music. It all has something to say, regardless of what that message is, and generally I think most of it sounds pretty good. Alright, some of it I just don't understand at all and I can't listen to more than a song of it, but I can endure.(really my taste in music is arbitrary) And I'm not going to hate on someone else for liking it. I don't really understand hate. I really don't see a point for it at all. I know that sounds very hippie or whatever, but I don't see a reason to hate anyone or anything. You shouldn't hate a person, for any reason. Especially if it's a celebrity or something, because you don't know them. You may dislike their product, but you do not know them as a person, so judgment is unnecessary and I believe it's just going to make you look unintelligent. You shouldn't hate a thing, because what is your hate going to do? Absolutely nothing except annoy you and all the people that you choose to tell about your hatred. Back to my music tastes, despite being slightly random, my boyfriend somehow manages to get all songs that I really do enjoy onto my mixtape. Also he's introducing me to some music that I never listened to before, but I find that I really like. So good for him, I guess.
Music, to me, is really just a snapshot of what the times are. The songs that are made in a certain era explain what's happening. So what's going on right now? What does our music say about our society? I'm not sure, actually. I think it says a lot of things, but it's all perspective. If I've learned anything in life, it's that nothing is finite or defined. Everything is going to be different to different people in some way. It's all taken different ways and the perspective keeps changing, all it takes is one little shift and everything seems totally new. Nothing can be judged, really, because it's all based on what we've decided is good or bad based on the perspective of who was in charge, the loudest, or whatever it was. I can't decide if that's amazing or horrifying.

"If music be the food of love, play on; give me excess of it, that, surfeiting, the appetite may sicken, and so die."-Twelfth Night by William Shakespeare


Monday, April 15, 2013

I Miss You

Today was the first day back from Spring Break at my school, and it made me think about a lot of things. First of all, I really don't like school, further pushing myself into the mold of a typical teenager. Second, I really missed all the people I didn't see, from my close friends to the group of guys in my PE class. It also made me think of how Spring Break is just a teaser for Summer Break, but I'm mostly going to talk about missing people. To miss someone is not usually a good feeling, but it's something most people experience. Sometimes it's because of a death, and that's always hard, but something we can eventually move past. We miss people that aren't with us. To miss someone is to wish that we were with them. At least to me, that is. I know that I'm going to miss my friends over break, and that's all fine because I spend a lot of time with them. But it's my class friends that I'm surprised about. I didn't even realize that I missed them until I saw them again today, and I realized that they're important to me, each on a different level. That's what it made me realize, that all these random people in my life mean something to me. I mean, the guy I'm dating right now used to be just some guy in the orchestra for the play I was in. So I need to remind myself to get to know those people better, because you never know who they're going to be in your life. It's like when they say that the person you're going to marry someday is out there somewhere, and maybe you've met them already, even just in passing.
Another thing about missing people is the really hard kind of missing. They're the people who aren't physically in your life anymore, and all you get are those texts that aren't the same as words and those rare calls or video chats. You miss them so much, but they're still there, in a way. This happens when a friend moves away, or when you met them at camp or on a cruise or something, or sometimes when a friend just becomes distant from you. It's hard to miss them because in a way, they are there, just not to the extent that you want or need. I have a few friends like this, from my summer camp that I absolutely love. And sometimes when pur texts become fewer and fewer, I get the feeling that it's not even worth it to miss them at all, but it is. Anyone that is worth caring about when they are there is worth caring about when they aren't, and I just have to work on my patience. Patience is the key to missing someone successfully, without it feeling pointless or stupid or like they don't care about you at all. Honestly, I think that caring about someone is one of the hardest things in the world to do.

"What I say in an entire paragraph you can say in three words."-Blood Promise by Richelle Mead

Sunday, April 14, 2013

Always a First

So I've always thought blogs were a little weird, but recently my friend Cat started a blog (see link below), and her posts have been really inspiring. It made me think that maybe I should try this, and I'm the kind of person that actually would, so here it is.
My name is Mackenzie, and I'm a typical high school girl, I think. I get pretty good grades, I've got awesome friends, an adorable boyfriend (although I'm not sure how he'd feel about getting called adorable), a supporting family, I do theater, and I write. That's me, in a sentence.
I feel like people want to be more than a sentence, they want to be great and fantastic. But the truth is that everyone can be described in one sentence. Now, don't get ahead of me here and think I'm going to be mean and depressing. A lot can fit into one sentence, and you get to decide how that sentence is written. It can be "I play the violin." or it can be a list like mine was, or it can be "I discovered the cure to cancer." Everything depends on how you choose to present yourself. People very rarely present themselves as someone awesome, and I think it's sad. Everyone should be proud of who they are, and frankly, that shy kid who never tells anyone how good they are at something is never going to get anywhere with it. For example, I'm a singer, and when i tell people that they always expect me to sing for them. I can either sing or sit there and be embarrassed, and I know which one is going to make it so I'm not confident enough to make it in the professional world (that's not what I want to do with my life, but for the sake of the example...)
Also, that one sentence to describe yourself can tell you who you are. What words you use tell you more about how you feel about yourself than they do your hobbies or interests. I believe that word choice is key to almost everything. It does a lot, and in any sentence, any single sentence, each and every word is important, so people should realize before they dismiss something. The simple things in life get ignored in life, but how difficult would it be for you to express yourself if the word "I" didn't exist? "It"? "And"? Appreciate the small things.
So that's me. I'm going to post here when I can and just write about anything. I'll take you inside my mind a moment, and you can enjoy, hate, comment, ignore, or do whatever else kids do these days.

"A cabin of freshly peeled logs cut from the land, a patch of dirt and stumps for a yard, mountains that serrated the sky."-The Snow Child by Eowyn Ivey

http://theworldsmycoloringbook.blogspot.com/